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Ben Franklin's bifocals Friday, September 8, 2006

Composer Antonin Dvorak
[1841 - Antonin Dvorak, composer, born in Nelahozeves near Prague, Czech Republic]

Galveston - wreckage from 1900 hurricane
[1900 - Galveston devastated by hurricane winds and storm surge, 8,000 people are killed]

Peter Sellers as Inspector Clouseau
[1925 - Peter (Richard Henry) Sellers, comedian, actor, born in Southsea, Hampshire, England]

[1939 - President Roosevelt proclaims limited national emergency]

[1974 - President Gerald Ford pardons a disgraced Richard Nixon]

Airport Profilers

airport surveillance story 9/7/06

On reading the above story in today's paper, william saw a preview of the logical result of our obsession with airport security. A skycap, (who has completed his correspondence course in terrorist recognition), comes to take grandma to the airplane in her wheelchair. En route he observes grandma engaging in unusual behaviors and presenting a highly agitated affect. Indeed, it is true that grandma has become increasingly eccentric in her old age. She is scared to death to fly anyway, and the constant din of terrorism fear tactics emanating from Washington (and faithfully reported by the news media) has really freaked her out.

As they near the jet-way, the skycap sees grandma rummaging in the shopping bag she always carries with her in lieu of a purse. She is looking for her anti-anxiety meds. Nearing a state of panic she finally finds and pulls them from the bag along with the bottle of water that she has with her. The skycap, convinced that he is dealing with a disguised terrorist about to mix and set off a bomb, crashes the wheelchair into the nearest wall and calls a code red.

Grandma's last moments are spent staring down the barrel of a submachine gun that she believes is in the hands of a terrorist. It is not the peaceful and quiet death in her sleep that she always wished for.

automatic weapon firing grandma close up

William's Whimsical Words:

You should pray that when this scenario finally plays out at LAX it is somebody else's grandma, and that the trigger-happy, minimum wage, high school dropout attendant behind the fast food counter hasn't watched so many episodes of "24" that he imagines himself the hero who saves us all from the bad guys.

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Last updated on September 8, 2006

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